TORONTO – Local man Eric Braiser is currently approaching the half-hour mark of politely listening to his friend Sarah talk about what a nightmare her recent flight out of Pearson was. R…
Tag: Featured Post
REPORT: Loneliness epidemic singled out, ostracized by other epidemics
RICHMOND, BC – As persistent loneliness continues to affect the health of billions, it remains unable to gain acceptance and inclusion from its epidemic peers. “I’ve been harming people’s well-be…
Hockey Canada buries Lucky Sexual Assault Settlement under centre ice before start of World Juniors
EDMONTON – In an effort to bring a little luck to our boys, Hockey Canada has revealed they had the ice maintenance crew at Rogers Place bury a lucky confidential sexual assault settlement …
10 craziest things the FBI found in Trump’s Mar-A-Lago estate
In the wake of the FBI’s raid into his private quarters at the Mar-A-Lago resort, there are many questions to be answered about what the investigation means for Donald Trump, the government…
Being held accountable by federal government clear proof that Trump is not a real billionaire
Palm Beach, FL – The FBI enforcing a search warrant on his Mar-A-Lago estate as a result of a DOJ investigation into his behaviour has made it abundantly clear that Donald Trump is not the …
Danielle Smith clarifies that it’s Alberta first, Saskatchewan second, New Brunswick last
EDMONTON – Running for leader of the UCP on a platform of ‘Alberta First’ Danielle Smith took time today to give reporters her clear ranking of the Canadian provinces. “Ma…
Sounds like roommate’s pretty bad at sex
EDMONTON – According to sources in Stacey Greene’s two-bedroom apartment, her roommate’s latest attempt at sex is not going well. “Taylor and their date disappeared into their room about 20 minu…
Buffoonery anticipated as man laden with food and drink attempts to enter hammock
CALGARY – Local bumbler Kevin Hurst is planning to enter his hammock with a variety of easily spilled snacks and beverages, prompting onlookers and analysts to anticipate a series of zany hijinks…
“Poilievre is too extreme to win a general election,” says man who also said that about Harper, Ford, Trump and the other Ford
Langley, BC – Local man Eric Anderson is confident that, even if he becomes Conservative leader, Pierre Poilievre’s extreme right-wing positions will make him totally unelectable, des…
Shakespeare festival to spice things up by casting actors they used before, a lot
STRATFORD, ON – Canada’s biggest Shakespeare festival is hoping to excite and intrigue audiences with their groundbreaking plan to cast actors they’ve cast many, many times before. “Shakesp…
