WASHINGTON, D.C. – A fiery Donald Trump has demanded that special investigator Robert Mueller not investigate any of his family’s financial deals, particularly the fraudulent ones involving…
U.S.
Insurance companies denying claims due to deterministic nature of universe
Chicago, IL – American health insurers have begun classifying all medical claims as pre-existing conditions and refusing to offer settlements because of the clockwork nature of the physical…
Sensing weakness, Loyalists plan recapture of New Hampshire
Kingston, ON – Seeking to exploit the political unrest and economic downtown in the United States of America, loyalists to the British Empire, who were driven to Canada after their defeat i…
New Netflix program just a live feed of your friends having fun without you
LOS GATOS, CA – Netflix has recently announced its newest slate of programming, including the hotly anticipated binge-worthy show A Live Feed of Your Friends Having Fun Without You, which w…
Barron Trump poised to coast into “smartest son” position
WASHINGTON D.C. – In yet another shift in Donald Trump’s tumultuous administration, young Barron Trump appears set to coast into the role of smartest son to the president of the United Stat…
Republican lawmakers call recess to play “Good Guys with guns vs Bad Guys with guns”
WASHINGTON D.C. — GOP lawmakers called for a short break in Congressional proceedings to go outside and play their favourite game: “Good Guys with guns vs Bad Guys with guns”. “The only thi…
Megyn Kelly, NBC to provide “much needed platform” to Holocaust deniers
NEW YORK — After using the first two episodes of her nationally broadcast, Sunday night news magazine as a soapbox for scrappy underdogs Vladimir Putin and Alex Jones, Megyn Kelly and NBC News an…
Trump pulls out of climate change agreement in hopes climate will cave, give better deal
WASHINGTON D.C. — President Donald Trump has announced that America will be withdrawing from the Paris Accord on Climate Change, a move which his administration says will force the climate to agr…
Entire G7 waits for Trump to leave so they can start real summit
SICILY – After two days of shuffling blank papers and waving shiny objects, heads of state from G7 countries have begun preparing for the actual summit scheduled to commence after Donald Tr…
Nepotism in the White House: Jared Kushner now gets to shave the president’s back
DISTRICT OF COLUMBIA – In what critics have described as ‘blatant nepotism’, President Trump has empowered son-in-law Jared Kushner to be the person who shaves his back. “Jared …
