TORONTO – In the wake of Jonathan Bernier’s blowout loss to the San Jose Sharks the Toronto Maple Leafs have announced that their starting goalie for Wednesday’s game against Columbus will …
Sports
Edmonton Eskimos currently reviewing Washington Redskins PR playbook
EDMONTON — In preparation for their upcoming face-off against Canada’s Inuit community, the Edmonton Eskimos are planning to borrow some public winning over maneuvers from the Washington Re…
Grey Cup: How players cope with the added pressure from tens of viewers
WINNIPEG — With the outcome of the 103rd Grey Cup between the Edmonton Eskimos and the Ottawa Redblacks far from certain, the pressure on the athletes is compounded by the dozens of viewers…
IOC announces new herniated disc throw event
LAUSANNE — The International Olympic Committee said it will be featuring the new herniated disc throw in both men and women’s categories. “For millennia, athletes have practiced this ancien…
Anthopolous rejects Rogers contract after realizing it only comes with 150 long distance minutes
TORONTO – The Blue Jays have announced the departure of General Manager Alex Anthopolous due to a contract dispute in which Rogers was only able to promise him 150 long distance minutes. “A…
Toronto Blue Jays fans eager to end 22-year rioting drought
TORONTO – After a two decade playoff absence fans of the Toronto Blue Jays are hopeful this will be the year they can finally destroy their city in a drunken World Series celebration. “I wa…
400,000 Blue Jays fans injured after bandwagon crashes outside stadium
TORONTO – Tragedy struck in the Rogers Center parking lot today when a head-on collision occurred between a sedan and a 400,000 seat bandwagon following yet another lopsided Blue Jays victo…
Encarnacion hits 3 home runs, scores 9 RBIs, ascends to being of pure energy
TORONTO – Following a historic performance of 9 RBIs and 3 home runs, including one Grand Slam, Blue Jays slugger Edwin Encarnacion shocked the capacity crowd at Rogers Center by transmutin…
Toronto man devastated upon realizing he threw away old Blue Jays jersey
TORONTO — Looking to show support for his home team following their recent string of successes, David Reynolds was grief stricken with the realization that he had discarded his old Blue Jay…
Nick Kyrgios fined at Rogers Cup for not using tennis-related euphemism in insult
TORONTO — Professional tennis star Nick Kyrgios was fined $10,000 after a match at the Rogers Cup, Wednesday, for insulting his opponent without using a tennis pun as required by ATP guidel…
