OTTAWA – Early reports from Elections Canada indicate that all political parties have lost the election. With all polls reporting, Elections Canada has confirmed that no one got what they w…
Politics
Justin Trudeau puts hat and sunglasses on corpse of electoral reform so no one can tell it’s still dead
AURORA, ONT. – While the Liberals and Conservatives remain neck-and-neck in the polls, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau was at pains to convince Canadians that electoral reform is not a moulde…
O’Toole urges Canadians to punish Trudeau for calling election, really punish him, yes, HARDER
RUSSELL, ONT. – At a recent campaign stop, Conservative leader and PM hopeful Erin O’Toole made it clear he wants the Canadian public to absolutely humiliate Trudeau in the election, break …
After Conservatives surge in polls, Trudeau reminds voters he’s also pretty racist
Ottawa, ON – After strong polling numbers showing the Conservative party’s newfound popularity, Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has changed tactics by reminding Canadians he can be j…
Maxime Bernier makes stump speech in ambulance bay
TORONTO – Dozens of PPC supporters joined Maxime Bernier in front of a hospital’s ambulance bay and emergency room where the political leader made his pitch to voters. The angry crowd of ab…
O’Toole promises to personally babysit your child
GATINEAU, QC – Conservative Party Leader Erin O’Toole has offered to personally babysit every Canadian child instead of funding new childcare spaces. “If elected as your prime minister, I w…
Erin O’Toole breaks with platform by running for the Liberals
VANCOUVER – In another sudden platform shift, Conservative Party leader Erin O’Toole announced he will run under the Liberal Party banner. O’Toole made the announcement after re…
Hibernation of unpopular conservative premiers signals federal election season
TORONTO – Writs dropping from Parliament has signalled the beginning of the hibernation period for odious, conservative provincial leaders who will nestle in their cabinet offices or homes.…
Liberals promise to make housing affordable for everyday Canadian millionaires
OTTAWA – The Liberal Party have announced their intent to ban foreign home-ownership for two years, ensuring that Canada’s housing stock will be reserved for everyday Canadians with seven f…