“Passengers are welcome to forgo the fee and simply pass out.” New episode of The Beaverton this Wednesday at 10pm EST on Comedy!…
National
Single piece of Canadian news drags its bloody, mangled carcass onto local man’s Facebook feed
MONTREAL – After barely managing to get onto the front page of the CBC website, a single piece of Canadian news has, against all odds, managed to find its way onto local man Jared Pulver’s …
Breaking: Trudeau loses only black friend
OTTAWA – Sources close to the PM say Justin Trudeau is heartbroken by Trump’s inauguration, as it means he will no longer be in close contact with his only “diverse” friend: U.S. President …
Trudeau investigated for vacation to the Kubla Khan’s private stately pleasure dome
OTTAWA – Just days after a media firestorm around his trip to the Aga Khan’s private island, an ethics investigation alleges Prime Minister Trudeau took a private helicopter to the Kubla Kh…
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Nation pats itself on the back for only being pretty racist
CANADA – In the lead-up to the inauguration of an openly xenophobic US president, Canada is taking a moment to quietly congratulate itself on only being very racist. “Obviously, we’re not a…
Trudeau returns from island vacay with souvenir ethics investigation
OTTAWA – A well-rested and freshly dreamy Prime Minister Trudeau returned from an island vacation in the Bahamas Monday with that “new controversy smell” after purchasing an ethics investig…
SHOCKING: Veteran suffering from PTSD gets help he needs
OTTAWA – In an event Veterans Affairs officials are calling “unnerving and disturbing” sources say a man diagnosed with post traumatic stress disorder after serving two tours of duty in Afg…
Report: 78% of nation’s municipal infrastructure funds spent on single Montreal overpass
MONTREAL — An audit has revealed that tens of billions in infrastructure spending has been dedicated to repairing a single overpass along Autoroute 15 in Montreal. All other national infra…
Rookie Minister of Youth Justin Trudeau survives Trudeau’s cabinet shuffle
OTTAWA – Despite a cabinet shuffle that saw prominent MPs Stephane Dion and John McCallum moved aside, inexperienced Minister of Intergovernmental Affairs and Youth Justin Trudeau has manag…
