Pierre Poilievre and the Conservatives plan to make Canada the freest country in the world if (ok once) they get into power. In unrelated news here is a list of everything Conservatives currently…
National
Liberal budget promises 10 bajillion dollars to whatever thing you’re into
OTTAWA – The new Liberal budget was officially released yesterday, with the government unveiling a number of plans involving new programs and spending, including $10 bajillion dollars for w…
Canada suffering productivity crisis, says government that does nothing
OTTAWA – Canada is in the midst of a severe productivity crisis, warns a report from Canada’s federal government, who also does jack shit. “This is an issue that cannot be ignored,” said a …
In honour of Mulroney, national funeral to be privatized
MONTREAL – In a show of respect to one of Brian Mulroney’s most cherished governing principles as prime minister, his funeral will be privatized. During his nine years as prime minister, Br…
Trudeau wondering if he should try being PM of a different country, now that he’s got the hang of it
OTTAWA – Prime Minister Justin Trudeau reports that he is considering running for leadership of a different country, following 9 years of “getting his feet wet” in Canada. ̶…
Canada to honour Brian Mulroney with week of raised GST rate
OTTAWA – In response to the death of Brian Mulroney, Canada’s 18th Prime Minister, the government has announced the nation’s GST will be doubled for one week. “The flags will go down, and the ta…
Trudeau: Protests at hospitals are reprehensible, bombings to be judged on a case by case basis
TORONTO – Following a pro-Palestinian protest that partially took place outside Mount Sinai Hospital in Toronto on Monday night, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau posted on Twitter/X to voice h…
“If only someone had the power to make corporations behave better,” laments prime minister
TORONTO – Prime Minister Justin Trudeau is deeply concerned about Bell Media firing 4800 workers, including hundreds of journalists, in their latest round of layoffs and wishes someone woul…
Pierre Poilievre describes more jobs
After Pierre Poilievre described an electrician as someone who “captures lightning from the sky and runs it through a copper wire to illuminate this room and light up the world” we sa…
Canadian Politicians New Year’s Resolutions
We asked the biggest names in Canadian politics what they hope to accomplish in the new year. Here is what they had to say:…