After 20 years and millions of albums sold, Grammy winning recording artists The Red Hot Chili Peppers have written their first ever song lyric that actually makes sense. “It all started wh…
Culture
Local woman still watching True Blood
TORONTO – Despite giving several vague answers on the topic in recent weeks, local woman Anna Trawley, 26, confirmed yesterday that she is “yeah…still probably going to watch the last season of T…
World Pride commemorates time when gays couldn’t get sunburned and pay $5 for a bottle of water
TORONTO – On a beautifully cloudless day in downtown Toronto, millions of gays, LGBTQ supporters, and people of all walks gathered to remember a time when homosexuals couldn’t get gou…
Fans detach selves emotionally to prepare for Game of Thrones season finale
CANADA – Fans of the hit HBO program Game of Thrones nationwide began to sever any and all of their connections with their favourite characters, fearing that yet another of the show’s…
Game of Thrones to raise revenue with product integration
LONDON — In the wake of discussions about how the popular fantasy saga Game of Thrones can maintain profitability as more and more viewers choose to illegally download rather than pay to view the…
123 Sesame Street torn down to make way for condos
SESAME STREET – Referring to the iconic location as an “eyesore”, Vancouver-based developers have announced plans to tear down 123 Sesame Street and replace it with a pair of 40-storey luxu…
New ‘Star Wars’ film casts Hollywood newcomer Mark Hamill
LOS ANGELES – Lucasfilm has released a photo from a recent table read of the new Stars Wars script, revealing the new leads to be John Boyega, Adam Driver, Daisy Ridley, and exciting unknow…
Report: ‘Hello Kitty’ actually best possible outcome of Kroeger/Lavigne collaboration
TORONTO – According to a recent study from the University of Toronto Faculty of Music, Avril Lavigne’s derided single “Hello Kitty” is, “when you think about it, literally the best thing th…
Christians celebrate sacred resurrection of church attendance
PORT COLBORNE, ON – Millions of Christians across the world from all sects are celebrating the miraculous resurrection of church attendance today. Pews were packed with the reluctant faithf…
