NEW YORK CITY – Audience members at New York’s famed Comedy Cellar reported that last night disgraced comedian Louis CK locked them in the room to watch him, insisting, “I promise it …
Culture
Fans worry The Big Bang Theory will end without revealing which nerd is the horniest
HOLLYWOOD – Ever since last week’s announcement that the upcoming 12th season of The Big Bang Theory would be the show’s last, fans have been expressing concern that the show would never re…
New Heritage Minute commemorates Canadian who sucker-punched Houdini
TORONTO — A newly released Heritage Minutes honours McGill student Jocelyn Gordon Whitehead, whose surprise attack on Harry Houdini is widely believed to have been the cause of his death in…
Netflix producer caught releasing dozens of bad movies into local river
HOLLYWOOD – A Netflix producer is facing charges after being caught dumping a number of god-awful movies into a local river. Residents began to report an excremental stench several weeks ag…
Canadian television producing yet another period drama in order to recycle costumes from other period dramas
HALIFAX, NS – After decades of riveting Canadian period dramas lulling the nation to sleep, network television has decided to produce yet another historical Canadian television show in orde…
Condom ad quickly running out of visual metaphors to signify cumming
New York, NY – The writing team behind Durex Ultrathin’s latest commercial have hit a stumbling block after realizing they have used up every known visual cue to let the audience know the p…
Studio pulls Mission: Impossible – Fallout from theatres after realizing it has the same female character as the last one
LOS ANGELES – Paramount Pictures is pulling the latest Mission: Impossible sequel from theatres and promising refunds for advanced ticket sales after concluding it was antithetical to the s…
Canada Council for the Arts slashes live theatre budget to fund ‘pets in hats’ Instagram accounts
OTTAWA – The Canada Council for the Arts announced a controversial new grant in hopes of branching out into new media while leaving the future of Canadian theatre uncertain. The funding pre…
Rich friend suggests going to concert
CALGARY – Dave O’Neil, a local man who must have family money or something, has suggested to his group of friends that they all go see the upcoming Foo Fighters concert. “I think it would b…
Murder mystery dinner theatre ends in real death for 4th night in a row
VICTORIA – While audiences are marveling at the realism on display during the current production of ‘Whomdunit, A Mystery in Three Courses’ at the Waterfront Theatre and Bistro, authorities…
