OTTAWA – Once considered a staple of North American culture, the hooded white robe is fading away into obscurity and many are wondering whether millennials are to blame. Financial investmen…
Culture
Classic Simpsons character George H. W. Bush dead at 94
HOUSTON, TX – George H. W. Bush, the beloved character from the classic, critically lauded early era of the long-running Fox animated program The Simpsons has died peacefully in his sleep. …
Margaret Atwood confirms Handmaid’s Tale sequel is just original manuscript but with more exclamation points
TORONTO – Margaret Atwood delighted fans of The Handmaid’s Tale this week with the announcement that she is currently penning a sequel. However, the prolific Canadian author quickly clarifi…
STUDY: TV shows made for teens exclusively consumed by mid-thirties viewers
LOS ANGELES — A recent study has proven that television specifically written for the teenage demographic is exclusively being consumed by people in their thirties. “At first we were flatter…
Connoisseur wants to know the hashtag for this art exhibit
TORONTO – After taking a selfie right outside the gallery entrance, a local art aficionado has asked Art Gallery of Ontario staff earlier today what the hashtag is for an exhibit, entitled …
Yukon’s first mosque opens, CBC immediately greenlights tv series
SUDBURY – A month after Yukon’s first mosque opened its doors, CBC announced today that production has begun on a series focusing on the mosque and the quirky residents of the surrounding area. S…
The disturbing backstory of this grown ass man’s Minions costume
MONTREAL, QC — As he slid his denim overalls over his bright yellow sweater while dancing to Q Lazzarus’s “Goodbye Horses,” Lain McNeal whispered to himself, “Would you fuck me? I would fuck me.”…
Local uncle unsure how long he can keep up charade of knowing what Fortnite is
LETHBRIDGE, AB — Local uncle Brad Reynolds, 36, is uncertain how long he can maintain the fiction that he understands who or what Fortnite is, to his nephew Tyler, 7, and niece Emily, 11. S…
That one guy you know from high school still defending Kanye West
MISSISSAUGA – A recent string of concerning posts on your Facebook feed has revealed that someone you went to highschool with still stans for Kanye West. Hunter Maldonado, the guy who would…
Woman who subscribes to 4 podcasts about child murder described as ‘happy-go-lucky’
CALGARY — Local woman Katie Johnston, who listens to approximately 3-5 longform stories each week involving grizzly deaths and/or serious crimes against innocent, usually helpless people, is cons…
