OTTAWA – Anonymous staff in the Prime Minister’s Office report they have an overwhelming sense of dread that something horrible is about to happen – though what, they do not know R…
Bob Dylan concerts to feature hologram of Bob Dylan that actually gives a shit
LOS ANGELES, CA – Inspired by the famous holographic projections of deceased artists like 2Pac Shakur and Biggie Smalls, Columbia Records executives have announced an upcoming Bob Dylan con…
US men’s basketball team win gold over [placeholder]
LONDON – On [date TBA] the United States basketball “dream team” defeated the [placeholder] team by a score of [placeholder] to 42. Kobe Bryant lead the scoring barrage with an unprecedente…
NDP asks to be included on mailing list for future murder-dismemberments
OTTAWA – Yesterday, NDP leader Thomas Mulcair sent a stern and clear message to any future murderers and dismemberers who wish to attract the public spotlight: next time, please include the…
Catholic Church rebrands Original Sin as ‘Sin Classic’
VATICAN CITY – Looking to renew interest in Catholicism among consumers aged 16-27, the Catholic Church announced yesterday that it would be rebranding its Original Sin to ‘Sin Classi…
