OTTAWA – A controversial new facility has opened its doors for MPs to openly reject partisan discipline and express themselves freely without fear of repercussions.
Party-Site will be a safe zone located in Parliament and will be staffed by five psychiatrists and partisan specialists.
“It’s quite tough for representatives to kick the habit of thinking for themselves or serving their constituents before their party” said Dr. J. Palacios-Boix of McGill University and head of the site. “I see many MPs who come from a rough local background; former city councillors, community activists and school board members who just can’t say no to their constituents. The downward spiral usually starts with visible scepticism of party policy followed by outbursts at caucus meetings. They hit rock bottom when they’re kicked out of their party and rambling about local affairs during Question Period. It’s heartbreaking.”
Party-Site will slowly wean MPs off of their own ideas and opinions and re-introduce them to party dogma and speaking points.
“I was very desperate for help” said former NDP MP Bruce Hyer who voted against his party and now sits as an Independent. “I just wish I could go back to the way it was and didn’t throw it all away by having a reasonable objection. I became isolated and distant from my peers. I had nowhere to turn to.”
Hyer said that programs like Party-Site will help him recover from his addiction and hopes the NDP will welcome him back.
However, MPs with offices near the facility have complained about its presence on their floor.
“Not in my Parliament” said Conservative MP Pierre Poilievre. “These MPs are dangerous and unpredictable when they express their own non-partisan ideas. I’m afraid to walk to my office. They don’t belong here.”
Still, many have high hopes that the facility will reduce the non-partisan exchange of ideas, unnecessary media stories and the disruption of parliamentary procedure.
“At the end of the day,” Dr. Palacios-Boix sighed “we need to see past addictions and hope these MPs will become spineless, unapologetically partisan ass-kissers like the rest of parliamentary society.”
