BY: Simon Bradshaw I’ve turned a blind eye at premarital sex, friends with benefits, and open relationships, but there comes a point when these new fads cross a boundary. I may be an old fogey, b…
Month: December 2018
Disgusting! Doctors performed surgery on this man and discovered his body was full of blood!
REGINA – In a story so unbelievable, it has to be true, doctors out in Regina, Saskatchewan opened up a patient’s abdomen as part of an appendix operation and made a totally gross discovery. It w…
Kinky anarchist enjoys autocratic asphyxiation
LETHBRIDGE, AB – Admitting he’s addicted to the rush he gets from choking members of the fascist capitalist elite, a self-described anarchist says his greatest sexual kink is autocratic asp…
Police stopping more drivers for random roadside jesting
TIMMINS, ON – A record number of motorists across the country have been pulled over by police for mandatory roadside jesting. A recent report has shown that since new jesting laws were pass…
5 Last-Minute holiday gifts for your parents that aren’t giving them grandchildren
Happy Holidays! Searching for one last present to put a smile on your mom or dad’s face? Well look no further: here are some terrific ideas for that special little something, other than to stop m…
Newfoundland finally admits mummers just their version of The Purge
ST. JOHN’S – This week the people of Newfoundland held a press conference to confirm longstanding suspicions that their Christmas tradition of mummering, where residents disguise themselves…
Cool aunt forces everyone to smoke pot this Christmas
BARRIE, ON — Since the legalization of marijuana, Canadians who originally demonized the drug are trying marijuana for the first time. Thus causing first time user, Cathy Lowe, to share her…
Quiz: Watching a Hallmark Christmas movie or trapped in an upper-middle class white person’s wet dream?
It’s Hallmark Christmas movie season! These films are pure holiday fun, with creative and unique plot lines involving princes, inheritances, fish-out-of-water moments…and that’s it, that’s …
After catching teen vaping, parent forces them to finish whole cartridge
BURLINGTON, ON — After 15-year-old Danius Jenkins was caught vaping, his parents Danielle Jenkins and Richard Mardow, made him finish the whole cartridge in the hopes that it would ruin vap…
Preview: ‘The Beaverton Year In Review 2018’ December 31 On CTV
If Miguel and Emma can get a word in.…