NEW YORK – Food Network has announced a new show to premiere this fall: This Is Shit!, which features Gordon Ramsay in various states of upset towards the appliances in his kitchen.
“Oh, look at you,” Ramsay spits at his oven in a trailer for the first episode. “Fucking twenty-five minutes to cook a salmon filet. If I’m going to wait that long, I might as well bloody wait for fish to evolve legs, and let the salmon walk to my fucking plate! You’re bollocks!”
In another scene, after discovering his rice not to be thoroughly cooked, an incensed Ramsay motions for his pot to come stand next to him. When the pot doesn’t move from the stove, he throws it to the floor, remarking that it would function just as well as a dog dish.
“I see it as a next step in culinary TV programming,” explained Food Network VP Bob Tuschman. “For years we’ve watched Gordon berate incompetent chefs, but most viewers can’t relate to that, since they’ve never run a restaurant. But we’ve all referred to a bread knife as a ‘donkey bastard’ after cutting our finger.”
Like many Food Network shows, Ramsay’s new program will have a competition element to it. Each appliance will attempt to minimize the amount they are yelled at, while maximizing the creativity of Ramsay’s screaming at other appliances. They will be eliminated when Ramsay rips them out of the wall and hurls them into the street.
The first season will show Ramsay tearing a strip off nearly every appliance in his kitchen: he screams at his dishwasher that he will “shove this plate up [your] ass sideways if it comes out with food spots again,” and informs his blender that his grandmother can make a smoother pesto, “and she’s fucking dead!” In one of the season’s tenser moments he simply mutters “I’m fucking done,” and leaves his appliances to figure out a meal on their own.
Tuschman added that there will be other new, cutting-edge shows on the network, including a yet-untitled program following Guy Fieri’s weekly regret-filled trips to his gastroenterologist.
