KINGSTON – In the wake of yet another barrage of back and forth insults from Democratic and Republican candidates alike, Kingston local Alex Hinds spent most of yesterday afternoon reflecting fondly on the presidency of Martin Sheen, which he believes lasted for about six seasons.
“They just don’t make Presidents like they used to,” Hinds wearily sighed while watching Donald Trump’s orange skin glow red with rage during a recent MSNBC broadcast. “I mean think about all the things Martin Sheen was able to accomplish in his presidency. The way he dealt with the shooting at Rosslyn, the genocide in Equatorial Kundu, or the Kennison State bombing – that man was a President. I bet today’s Presidential candidates couldn’t even locate Equatorial Kundu on a map.”
Alex got off his couch and cracked a beer before continuing, “Back then everything was so transparent. I actually have memories of watching Martin Sheen come up with many of the strategies that he later put to use. Like when he was negotiating that historic peace settlement between Israel and Palestine, I actually felt like I was in the room with him.”
Alex’s fondness for Martin Sheen’s presidency, however, extended far beyond the former President and his policies.
“I also miss Rob Lowe. That guy was a great Communications Director. To think he wrote the famed Kennison State Bombing Speech – delivered beautifully by President Martin Sheen – in the car on his way to the Kennison State memorial. I mean, c’mon, you couldn’t make that stuff up.”
