TORONTO – Writer Alice Nguyen has found herself completely unable to complete a pivotal moment in her novel in which her main character, Michael, opens a pickle jar.
“I just can’t find his motivation. What makes a person open a pickle jar?” said Nguyen, sitting at her computer. “It’s all really awkward. I just can’t seem to get a solid grip on the characters.”
Nguyen, who has spent the last hour grunting and straining at her computer, is flabbergasted by the difficulty she’s having writing this fairly ordinary sequence. The successful author admits she thought she could write anything after completing her 2012 sci-fi novel about Triassic-period dinosaurs who attempt to form a Communist state.
“Is it that the pickles are symbolic of his relationship with his deceased mother? Does their saltiness remind him of tears, so recently shed after his bitter divorce? Did he just finish making a sandwich?” said Nguyen, flexing her aching fingers. “God, I don’t even want to write about this anymore. At this point it’s just the principle.”
Nguyen said that even her husband Todd, who’s usually pretty handy, wasn’t able to get the narrative unstuck.
“I spent a solid 5 minutes just trying to force it but it’s still holding fast,” said Todd. “Wait a second… Oh God, did I spend that whole time turning his motivations the wrong way?”
At press time, Nguyen had finally finished the scene after realizing all she needed was one good, strong twist.
