BY: AMANDA LANG, CBC’s SENIOR BUSINESS CORRESPONDENT
RBC values their customers. To show their appreciation, they are now offering RBC Rewards members the ability to redeem favourable media coverage to earn rewards. Become an RBC Rewards member and you can earn any of the following great prizes by manipulating reporting about the company. It’s easy! Here’s how.
If you don’t feel like overtly muzzling major stories about RBC, it’s no problem! You can get started just by dismissing RBC’s abuse of the temporary foreign worker program. Do it within several months of signing up and you can earn an endorsement of your book from RBC CEO Gord Nixon. And that’s just the beginning!
Actively sabotaging your fellow journalists will earn you speaking engagements. Bolster your profile in the business community while getting financial rewards. For each speaking engagement, you earn more fees. You earn double the points if you continue to give speaking engagements despite being told to cancel a speaking contract with an RBC-affiliated company. Triple them if that company is also accused of wrongdoing.
Are your bosses preventing you from landing more speaking gigs? Don’t worry, RBC’s got you covered. There are even more ways to keep earning rewards. You can redeem up to 500 000 points for each time you use your prominence at a national broadcaster to get management to spike scandalous stories about RBC.
Give one of our spokespeople a softball interview, and you can open up a new tier of rewards. For every claim an RBC official makes on your show that you fail to press or verify, you earn points toward one free intimate relationship with a member of our management. Sit back in splendour as one of RBC’s excessively well-compensated executives fulfils your most profound physical and emotional desires.
Sign up for the new RBC media rewards program, and start earning today!
Conditions apply. See website for details.
