FAIRFAX, VA – The NRA released a statement earlier today advising that all gun owners purchase an additional gun to be used in self-defense against the other guns they own. “Statistic after…
Tag: Guns
Yeah, but Saudi Arabia’s money never executed anyone
By: Stéphane Dion, Minister of Foreign Affairs Okay, at first glance, I’ll admit, this looks bad. Like, really, really, super crazy bad. I mean, how could I, Stephane Dion, Canada’s Foreign Affai…
NRA demands tougher regulations on presidential tears
WASHINGTON DC – Following a press conference where President Obama was moved to tears while discussing recent horrific mass shootings, the National Rifle Association has demanded that Congr…
Gun rights to play important role at this year’s Teddy Bear Picnic
Woods, Forest – The annual gathering of Teddy Bears for a picnic and all around gay time, has been met with controversy this year, due to Teddy Bear gun rights activists wanting to bring th…
NRA mourns as USA hit by 338th totally random, unpreventable mass-shooting this year
COLORADO SPRINGS, CO – In a tragedy that no one could have predicted, the USA was rocked yesterday by a random mass-shooting for the 338th time this year. “After the first one this year we …
Harper warns niqab could be used to conceal some kind of mouth gun
OTTAWA – After weeks of promising to ban the niqab from citizenship ceremonies, Prime Minister Stephen Harper has revealed that the face-covering garment could be more dangerous than origin…
Mass shooting in _________, USA kills ___
__________, USA — Up to ___ people were killed and ____ more injured after a gunman opened fire at a ________. There were conflicting reports about casualties, but _______ from _______Count…
Smith and Wesson unveils new shoot-ier gun
SPRINGFIELD, MA – Citing a decline in super cool firearms and wicked gunfights, weapon manufacturer Smith and Wesson has revealed a new line of shoot-ier, blast-o-riffic hand-cannons. “This…
Has anyone seen my gun?
BY CONSTABLE SHERMAN McGARRY, CALGARY POLICE DEPARTMENT Uh, Hi. I hate to bother you with this problem, but have you seen where I put my Colt C8 assault rifle that I put somewhere? Oh boy, I’d be…
Halifax, nation relieved to hear mass shooting plot was planned by white people and not terrorists
HALIFAX – A concerned community and country were sighing in relief yesterday after authorities confirmed the suspects involved in plot to kill as many innocent people as possible were just …