LOS ANGELES – Production has begun on an all white, male reboot of the hit 2016 movie Hidden Figures. The movie, titled simply, Figures, will tell the story of three caucasian men who don’t…
U.S.
Major security breach: Donald Trump’s personal phone is an outdated Fisher-Price model
This is major: after a campaign that focused relentlessly on Hillary Clinton’s use of an unsecured email server, it has now come to light that the president’s phone is an outdated Fisher-Price mo…
Report: Trump’s first mini-boss defeated
WASHINGTON – Anti-Trump activists across the country are celebrating following the resignation of National Security Advisor Michael Flynn, the first mini-boss in the gauntlet of minions which mus…
Betsy DeVos buys public school to practice on
WASHINGTON, DC – Recently-confirmed Education Secretary Betsy DeVos has purchased a small public school to practice on before she assumes the responsibilities for her new job. “I̵…
Mitch McConnell Congressmansplains arcane senate rules to Elizabeth Warren
WASHINGTON D.C. – One day after Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell stunned Democrats when he interrupted Massachusetts Senator Elizabeth Warren’s speech about Jeff Sessions’ past and us…
Betsy DeVos promises to pass GED in time for first day of work
WASHINGTON D.C. – Immediately after being confirmed as Secretary of Education in an extremely close Senate vote, Betsy DeVos spoke to the media and promised to secure her General Educationa…
“This is how fascism starts,” says man who hasn’t been paying attention for last couple months
FREDERICTON — Local man Carl Hampton recently retweeted Donald Trump’s statement that “all negative polls are fake news” with the phrase “This is how fascism starts,” notably missing out on the f…
Intelligence Agencies allege Russian campaign to disseminate fake horoscopes
WASHINGTON D.C. – Former CIA Director John Brennan briefed members of Congress this morning, alleging a massive cyber disinformation campaign waged by Russia to circulate misleading and eve…
American coal mines reopened after Trump buries million tons of coal
WEST VIRGINIA – Following through on his promise to get coal country working again, Donald Trump has purchased millions of tons of coal, and buried it throughout the West Virginian countrys…
Americans substitute ‘hang in there kitty’ posters for ‘ostrich with head in sand’
UNITED STATES OF AMERICA – As the dust settled on the first week of the new U.S. administration, millions of Americans sought to redecorate for the impending apocalypse by tearing down thei…
