HOUSTON – The Houston chapter of the American Red Cross has issued a desperate plea for thoughts and prayers as Hurricane Harvey inundates southern Texas with record rainfall and devastatin…
U.S.
Trump appoints Hurricane Harvey head of FEMA
HOUSTON — President Donald Trump has shocked Washington insiders by naming the Category 4 storm currently battering Houston as his head of the disaster relief agency FEMA. At 9:45pm Sunday …
US Open begins with ceremonial janitor throwing tennis balls off the roof
NEW YORK CITY – Marking the start of the US Open, tens of thousands gathered outside the USTA Billie Jean King National Tennis Center Sunday evening to witness the ceremonial janitor throwi…
EXCLUSIVE: Donald Trump’s 13 deleted eclipse tweets
WASHINGTON D.C. – President Donald Trump once again ignored the desires of his staff today, taking to social media to unleash a tweet-storm during today’s total eclipse. While the tweets ha…
Steve Bannon leaves White House in search of whiter house
WASHINGTON, D.C. – Stephen K. Bannon, White House strategist and de facto leader of the uncivil rights movement, has resigned from his post as the president’s most trusted advisor, citing a…
Right-wing history buff objects to removal of Strom Thurmond’s bedbug infested mattress
Columbia, SC – A battle is brewing over the fate of a 40-year-old bedbug-ridden mattress believed to once have been slept on by deceased South Carolina Governor and Senator Strom Thurmond. …
Traitors: moderate Republicans just voted against letting the President use The Machine
WASHINGTON, D.C. – Once again blocking the President’s plans to Make America Great Again, moderate Republicans in Congress and the Senate are refusing to vote in favour of allowing Donald J…
Trump outsources White House manufacturing council to China
WASHINGTON DC – After a string of resignations from his manufacturing council, President Donald Trump has decided to outsource all of the positions to Chinese business leaders. Trump first …
Norfolk Ledger-Dispatch apologizes for error in 1945 headline
NORFOLK, VA – The Norfolk Ledger-Dispatch, the paper of record for Norfolk, Virginia, has issued a correction to a 1945 story that indicated that Nazi organizations were no longer functioni…
Aides look on aghast as Donald Trump stares directly at the sun for thirty minutes
STERLING, VA – The forty-fifth president of the United States spent thirty minutes staring directly into the sun today on the putting green of the eighth hole of the Trump National Golf Clu…
