WASHINGTON, D.C – Maintaining their pro-life, pro-gun stance, a Republican feminist initiative, is fighting to protect women’s rights by allowing them to arm their vaginas. The “Women’s Rig…
Politics
Republicans praise thoroughness of blank piece of paper with “Kavanaugh FBI Investigation” written on it
WASHINGTON D.C. — Senators Flake, Collins, and the rest of the GOP are praising the FBI’s report on their investigation into Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh, which consists entirely o…
New Brunswick happy to make national news not related to tragedy
MONCTON, NB – Citizens across the province of New Brunswick were celebrating the accomplishment of making national news from coast to coast that wasn’t related in any way to a tragic event.…
Poll finds 17% of Canadians would support Maxime Bernier’s party just to see look on Andrew Scheer’s face
OTTAWA—A new poll shows that a surprisingly high number of Canadians would support the new People’s Party launched by Maxime Bernier solely for the pleasure of watching Conservative leader Andrew…
Trying to appeal to suburban Canada, Jagmeet Singh delivers hateful speech against himself
OTTAWA – Attempting to gain the support of the Quebec and Saskatchewan NDP caucuses and assuage fears about his ability to appeal to rural Canadians, Jagmeet Singh used a recent speech to l…
Man who will not be deported if he fails CAQ’s proposed values test finds Quebec election boring
MONTREAL – A local man who will be unaffected by Francois Legault’s CAQ’s proposal to remove immigrants from Quebec for failing an arbitrary values test has called the provincial election “…
Munk Debates: Steve Bannon and David Frum to debate whether hate crimes are better than war crimes
TORONTO – The Aurea Foundation has announced that former Breitbart chairman Steve Bannon and George W. Bush speechwriter David Frum will headline the Munk Debates this year, finally settlin…
Heavily indebted federal NDP cuts out orange as party colour to save money
OTTAWA – The federal NDP’s $3.1 million debt in assets is forcing the party to give up on its traditional orange colour for a much cheaper option. “It’s black and white until we’re back int…
Proud Boys apparently going to stick with that name
NEW YORK CITY – After two years of advocating “western chauvinism” in the form of wearing Fred Perry golf shirts and not masturbating it appears that far right group the Proud Boys are real…
Trump insists tape of him using n-word doesn’t exist, was just a joke, and also is the best tape of anybody using any slur
WASHINGTON, D.C. – Following the release of an audio recording of candidate Donald Trump’s aides discussing how to spin an alleged tape of the former reality TV host using the n-word, the …