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National
Justin Trudeau voted 3rd best Prime Minister named Trudeau
OTTAWA – Two years into his term as leader of Canada, a new study has revealed that Canadians perceive Justin Trudeau to be the third-best Prime Minister named Trudeau in the nation’s histo…
How will big pharma ruin legal weed for Canadians?
Donavon investigates.…
Ethics watchdog says cabinet ministers must disclose how much of their wealth is pirate booty acquired during coming-of-age adventures
OTTAWA – In the wake of several recent scandals involving the finances of federal Liberals, Canada’s ethics commissioner has suggested new rules that would force ministers to disclose exact…
Nation can’t remember what Stephen Harper looks like
OTTAWA – In the wake of Stephen Harper’s open letter on the NAFTA renegotiations the entire nation of Canada has realized they no longer have any idea what their previous prime minister looks lik…
Royal Canadian Mint announces new quarter not commemorating anything
OTTAWA – In a bold move, shattering years of public expectations, the Royal Canadian Mint has announced plans for a new circulation quarter that will not commemorate any person, place, or e…
Trudeau demonstrates support for middle class by wearing ‘two car garage’ socks
OTTAWA – Members of Canada’s embattled middle class say they feel “heard and supported” after Prime Minister Justin Trudeau was photographed wearing socks embroidered with two car garages earlier…
Morneau vows to balance budget by turning Department of Finance into numbered shell company
OTTAWA – Minister of Finance Bill Morneau has announced that in order to increase efficiency and lower costs the Department of Finance will be transitioned to a shell company with a numbere…
Quebec demands English Canada recognize its distinct racism
QUEBEC CITY – The government of Quebec has passed a new law banning the Niqab as a way to prove that their brand of racism is unique and independent from the racism prevalent in the rest of…
Nation’s women running out of ways to say “YEAH OF COURSE IT’S HAPPENED TO ME!”
OTTAWA – A social media trend created in response to producer Harvey Weinstein’s assault allegations has reportedly exhausted methods for women to say “Yes all women”, “Me too”, “Obviously”…
