MONTREAL – Electromania at Club Soda has produced the latest number one hit single courtesy of a skipping vinyl record. DJ Dangerzone was mixing last week when ‘Vox Humana’ by Kenny Loggins…
Culture
Chris Brown quits music industry to escape abusive relationship with media
LOS ANGELES – R&B singer Chris Brown has announced that, following the release of his album “X”, he will retire from the music industry after facing what he described as a “steady, unre…
Elevator mechanics strike causes city wide outbreak of sitcom premise
VANCOUVER – The recently resolved strike of all elevator mechanics and repairmen caused a rash of tired sitcom tropes and recycled plot lines to break out across the city. “I was stuck in a…
Disney defends Depp’s role as Native American: ‘We were unable to find a dark-skinned Italian’
LOS ANGELES – After the first night of Disney’s The Lone Ranger premiere, the mass media corporation that produced the western classic remake responded to concerns regarding their casting choice …
Concertgoers stunned as rock band returns to stage following curtain call and resumes playing
CLEVELAND – Following a 2-hour show by indie rock group Afterglow Green, local concertgoers were absolutely dumbfounded as the musicians returned to the stage and played new, additional son…
Werner Herzog signs on to direct The Hangover pt. IV
LOS ANGELES – Despite being known as a documentarian and art-house cinema producer, German filmmaker Werner Herzog has signed on to direct the latest installment of the Hangover franchise. …
Author sucked into own novel wishes he was better at writing women
COUNTY OF UNDISCOVERED, ONTARIO – After being magically trapped inside his latest novel, author Kyle Rapoport maligned his inability to properly write and develop female characters. “At fir…
Canadian actor achieves realistic life goal by booking Tim Hortons commercial
TORONTO – 33-year-old Canadian actor David Allister reached his realistic life goal earlier this week when he was booked for a spot on a Tim Hortons commercial. The 30-second ad features Al…
Children’s entertainer miraculously revealed not to be a molester
LOS ANGELES – The child entertainment industry was rocked today by the news that late children’s TV personality and host of The Flower Hour Peter Plantman, had, despite his career choice an…
The Junos happened, sources report
OTTAWA- A Canadian awards show that honours musical achievements by Canadian artists and bands recently occurred, according to a number of sources. “Yep, that was this month, I think,” one source…
