WINNIPEG – Despite reports confirming that local librarian Richard Gordon is a complete beta cuck, further evidence has recently emerged that he is in a happy and healthy marriage of severa…
Culture
Jimmy Fallon/Donald Trump lip sync battle draws mixed reactions at Golden Globes
BEVERLY HILLS – Tonight’s 74th annual Golden Globes award ceremony experienced an awkward hiccup earlier tonight when host Jimmy Fallon introduced a surprise guest, president-elect Donald T…
SeaWorld orca commits suicide by cop
ORLANDO, FL – After thirty-three years in prison, a daring escape, and a high-speed chase, SeaWorld’s prize orca, Tilikum, has committed suicide-by-cop, rather than return to his maximum se…
Canadians answer Friends trivia and one of them may be a werewolf: BeavFeed
The one where our sound guy gets devoured.…
Cool aunt now appropriating Asian culture
PETERBOROUGH, ON – After five months of yoga and Bhagavad Gita quotes that she read online, Aunt Deborah has now begun to misappropriate cultural elements from various east Asian societies,…
Experts: old celebrities to continue dying in 2017
The last 12 months claimed the lives of an exceptional amount of older celebrities including Alan Rickman, David Bowie, Carrie Fisher, Leonard Cohen and Muhammed Ali, just to name a few. However,…
2016’s dead music icons form unlistenable supergroup in Heaven
HEAVEN – Boasting a lineup that includes some of the greatest talent of the 20th and 21st centuries, the deceased music icons of 2016 debuted a new supergroup in the afterlife this week wit…
Fuck Town
New CBC show promises to be even edgier than Schitt’s Creek.…
Snob only reads novelizations of films
REGINA, SK – Searching for authentic storytelling, local coffee shop assistant manager Shawn Brockston says he is done with mainstream Hollywood films, opting to only read the novelizations…
Amber’s Alert
Meet The Beaverton’s new Beauty expert.…
