EDMONTON – In response to a report that called for dramatic cuts to health care and education to balance the budget, Alberta’s schools have already started rebranding themselves after oil s…
Alberta
Child expertly carries out covert pee in pool
EDMONTON, AB — Earlier today, during a pool party at his neighbour’s house, Tommy Watkins, 7, successfully executed an unnoticed pee in the pool. “When you love playing in the pool as much …
Majority of Canadians support country’s separation from Jason Kenney
EDMONTON – A new poll suggests that a majority of Canadians support Canada making a clean break from Alberta Premier Jason Kenney. If a referendum were held today, 92% of Canadians would sa…
East Coast man who moved to Alberta three years ago to lead provincial separatist movement
EDMONTON – A Nova Scotia native and Alberta oilsands worker will lead a newly formed secession from Canada movement in the Western province. 36-year-old Gord McGovern of Antigonish will lea…
Alberta threatens that it is open to the idea of possibly considering the notion of maybe exploring the concept of seceding from Canada perhaps
CALGARY – A shocking poll has revealed that over half of Albertans are not only not not opposed to the idea of remaining a part of Canada, they are actively considering considering the oppo…
Stampede officials place tarp over Stampede
CALGARY – Stampede officials have confirmed they will be placing a giant tarp over the entire Calgary Stampede at the next year’s rodeo to protect people from seeing what is being done to l…
Alberta looks for new dying, volatile industry to tie economy to
CALGARY — One of the United Conservative Party’s first acts is to create a brand new task force to find a replacement for the oil sands as the erratic, short term linchpin of Alberta’s econ…
Jason Kenney vows to sue wildfires for defaming oil industry
EDMONTON – After wildfire smoke blanketed Edmonton yesterday and forced the cancellation of what should have been a triumphant celebration of the repeal of Alberta’s carbon tax, Premier Jas…
Alberta government lowers minimum wage for minors as part of new ‘Tiny Hands, Tiny Rights’ initiative
EDMONTON – Fulfilling their campaign pledge to strip away the rights of children, on Monday the UCP controlled legislature of Alberta passed a bill lowering the minimum wage for workers und…
Triumphant Jason Kenney celebrates win by preemptively blaming Rachel Notley for everything that’ll go wrong during his premiership
CALGARY – After thanking everyone who worked on the campaign and everyone who voted UCP, future Alberta premier Jason Kenney took a moment during his victory speech to give a special thank …
